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► ERAP JOKES

Posted by justblogging

SEX IN THE MOVIES

Reporter: "Mr. President, what can you say about sex in the movies?"

Erap: "I am against it. Ang daming motel, bakit pa sila nagsi-sex
sa sinehan. Hindi dapat yan."

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KAMUKHA DAW

Jingoy: Dad, sabi nila pagnakaharap ako kamukha ko si Jose Rizal,
pag-nakaside view kamukha ko naman si Manuel Roxas. Anong ibig sabihin yon?

Erap: Mukha kang pera.

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FIRST LOVE

Ininterbyu si Erap tungkol sa kanyang lovelife:

Reporter: First love?
Erap: Never dies, syempre.
Reporter: About your first crush?
Erap: Ahh? awa ng Diyos, sa dami ng flight ko ngayon, wala naman.

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THE ORDER

In a Japanese restaurant.

Erap : Bigyan mo ako nung TA-KEHO-ME, waiter.

Waiter : Sir "Take Home" po ang basa diyan.

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THE WIFE

Sa isang party. Sabi ng isang Ambassador to Erap,

"I haven't met your wife. Where is she?"

Napadaan si First Lady Loi. Sabi ni Erap, "Oh, my wife just passed away."

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HISTORICAL

ERAP: Pare,may problema ako sa kumare mo.
Masyadong historical tuwing nag-aaway kami.

PARE :Baka hysterical ang gusto mong sabihin.

ERAP: Hindi, historical talaga, pare.
Kasi pag kami nag-aaway, lagi na lang niyang
inuungkat 'yung nakaraan.

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